I used to preach that there are no cultural differences between people coming from different countries. I based my conviction on the fact that since we are all human being we should all feel the same and have the same values. My husband, who grew up in a different country always say: “my wife and I never had any problem because of cultural differences, but we do have differences because of our different gender.” But this is another story….
Living in Sudan definitely made me think twice before saying that cultural differences don’t exist. The Sudanese I met here think that the American culture is not what they aspire to; my co-worker Hamid keeps telling me that his American friends are not close to their family. American families, he believes, are scattered around the U.S. and they hardly visit each other during the holidays or even when one of them is sick. Hamid explained to me: “in Sudan when a member of the family is sick, his relatives take a day off from work and go visit him. If a Sudanese is in the hospital his relatives go the hospital and stay outside his room no matter how long it will take and until he checks out. Sudanese young people never leave the house unless they get married…” and so one, listing a long list of good family manners that seem very nice, but do they work for everybody? I guess this work for some countries, but not for us. Maybe it works in patriarchal societies or in countries with absent governments. I believe that in countries where governments provide security, stability and protection to their citizens the citizens feel confident to be by themselves and don’t have to rely on their family. The pursue of happiness, freedom, and the chance to be able to fulfill what a human being need in order to reach maturity and independence, is a quality of life that very few countries are able to give to their citizens.
It’s 11:00 p.m. and as I try to go to sleep I hear the dogs outside barking, and I say to myself this is maybe going to be their last bark before the police patrol shoots them. Yes, here dogs are terminated on the street, periodically. Sudanese fear that dogs may bring disease.
The special cleaning truck just parked on the street. Cleaning trucks in Sudan come every week to empty the sewage, since there is no sewer system. This is a privilege that middle class families can afford; to hire truck to vacuum out the dirt that builds up in a whole under the houses. Maybe the government could start a pipe line not for oil (for once) but for the sewage.
I have to ignore the barking, and try not to inhale too much of the neighborhood smell filling the air from the truck, and then I can go to sleep, so tomorrow my co-worker Hamid will tell me how much the Sudanese are different because they care about their families. We definitely have cultural differences.
So interesting, Mirella. I think while at our core there are things that make all humans similar–maybe our basic needs and desires–there are definitely cultural differences. I find them interesting, noting them even as I move around within the U.S., but I believe it’s important not to let the differences keep us from finding common ground on which we can connect. If we could do that, the world would be a lot more peaceful.
As always, thanks for sharing your experience! Hope you finally got some sleep.
Gwen,you are a typical nice, sweet, good hearted, tolerant American. I wish the world can see what a true American is…
People like you made me fall in love with the US, and you make me feel so proud to be a US citizen.
Oh those poor little doggies…I must agree with Hamid, at least…from my personal dysfunctional American family experience. Good to find your post again.
Bless You
paul
they aslo have disfunctional families, and they fight more than you think Paul.
Bless you too, and thank you for visiting my blog again
Mirella
Hi Mirella, it is nice to hear from you. There are cultural differences whether we like them or not. I love my life here in Italy, but I will never understand how these people think. They love their families but stifle them. There is little community spirit. It seems to me it is every man for himself. I find much more community cooperation in Australia, a place where Italians we don’t care for our families as much as they do. As I said, I will never understand.
Thanks for sharign your experience Deb. I am glad my post got everybody think about their experience… I love cyberworld.
I’ve heard similar lectures about Americans…once while passing a woman begging for change in a north African city…I was being lectured about how “Charity starts at home and how Americans fail to give to their own…”…he didn’t give her any attentions or change….so I did. As they say…’people in glass houses should not throw stones’…enjoyed you post.
Oh Yes Charlie, so true. I dont get it how they came to the conclusion that they treat each other better than we do…(Sigh)
There are differences between people in the same country as well. The same can be said here in the cities like here in Sydney Australia to those who live in Queensland (north). It would be awkward about the dogs though. We just need to be tolerant.
thanks!
Stereotypes are easy shortcuts. And they are, unfortunately, quite common. Not sure whether they stem from mere ignorance or/and acute intellectual laziness… No worries my sweet friend. Keep feeling proud of who you are (and become). That’s all what matters. Hugs and kisses
thans habibi Nayoul!
I love the “Acute intellectual laziness”… hahaha never heard of this before, youa re a genius!
Ah, sterotypes are like soundbites: you may be tempted to think you’re getting the whole story, but you are not. Very dangerous and distrespectful. Even families have a “culture” … we want to accept and be accepted, but we don’t necessarily want to adopt.
Your posts are always thought provoking, Mirella.